The Night the Lights went out in San Francisco

Rain is pelting the roof of our motel room; it’s raining so furiously it feels like rocks are hitting my head. Five of us are sharing a dank room at the Red Roof Inn San Francisco Airport. Four of us of us sleep in each double bed, two to a bed, and I’m the sorry […]

frightened runner July 30

Running: A Love Story

I ran. I ran amidst the chaos of being a new flight attendant. I ran to the point of exhaustion. I ran so I didn’t have to think about anything else. I ran in strange places and put myself in danger. Wherever I traveled, I ran. I ran in Arlington, Texas in 1995. It was […]

20130204175437-hazing7 June 25

Flight Attendants, Prepare for Hazing

  Flight attendant new hire training is a form of hazing. (Haze [haz]: to haze: verb: To harass with unnecessary or disagreeable tasks.) The need to haze flight attendant trainees is understandable. It would be foolish to take a group of people who looked forward to an easy, glamorous job and not prepare them for […]

Unknown-3 April 27

Playing With Yourself and Other Ways to Endure a Flight

You wake up at SeaTac, SFO, LAX. You wake up at O’Hare, Dallas-Fort Worth, BWI. Pacific, mountain, central. Lose an hour, gain an hour. This is your life, and it’s ending one minute at a time. –Chuck Palahuniuk, Fight Club. I always identified with this sentiment, because even though travel was my livelihood, it made […]

images March 11

How Not Smiling Made Me a Better Flight Attendant

Ever feel like you’re living a lie? I did for a while, and it was scary. I‘d become a flight attendant—a job where smiling is fundamental—but I am not natural smiler. I’ve often been told, “You’d be a lot prettier if you smiled more.” But my natural face is a stoic face. And when I […]

images December 18

It Could Have Been Worse, Right?

Christmas day, 1995: I’m in a deep slumber from which I can’t wake up.  I’m dreaming I’m being chased by a mass of hungry, tired people. I try to tell them that I can’t help them, but whenever I try to speak, my voice is gone. I hear a wailing siren; the police are after […]

Unknown-1 November 09

How to Lose a Pilot in 10 Days.

I am sitting on the passenger’s side of my car, crying because the song , “Drops of Jupiter” by Train just came on the radio. It’s the corniest song ever written, but it’s making me cry because it idealizes what I thought I wanted: a meaningful relationship. Fuck meaningful relationships. I had been searching for […]

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